Rules of conduct at the table:

1. Start eating after the inviting colleague or the main person, the mistress of the house, has done it.

2. Do not swing utensils, spread or rest your elbows on the table while eating. You can put your elbows on the table if the music sounds loud and you need the interlocutor to hear you.

3. Do not wave the napkin, but place it on your knees with the fold towards you. Do not tuck the napkin behind the collar, or between the buttons of a shirt, or in the waistband of trousers. Never use a tissue as a handkerchief. If you leave the table, put a napkin on a chair; when finished eating - on the table, to the left of the appliances.

4. Do not fall apart in a chair, sit straight, keep your elbows longer from the table, if you don’t know where to put your hands, put them on your knees.

5. Chew with your mouth closed, do not talk while chewing.

6. Do not put too much food, chew food thoroughly.

7. Don't spit anything into your palm.

8. The plate to the left of the main one is for bread, the butter must first be put on the bread plate, and not directly from the common one to your piece.

9. Break off bread and buns. Nothing can be dropped anywhere. No need to smear the sauce from the plate with bread.

10. Do not take anything with your hands except bread.

11. Do not blow on hot food or drinks, do not sip. Drink hot food quickly with water. If there is no water, quickly and discreetly remove the hot piece from your mouth with your fingers or spit it on a fork, then place it on the edge of your plate.

12. If you come across poor-quality food, do not swallow, but remove it from your mouth quickly and imperceptibly. Don't spit into a tissue.

13. When finished eating, do not move the plate away from you, just place the cutlery parallel to the plate, the fork with the teeth down, the knife with the convex side to the fork, and the napkin to the left of the plate, without straightening. It is allowed to put a fork and a knife crosswise on a plate.

14. Put the briefcase on the floor, hang the bag on the back of a chair, to your left. Never put papers on the table, keep them in your hands.

15. While eating, do not look at partners for a long time or at close range.

16. Even if the meal takes place in the part of the restaurant where smoking is allowed, it is better to refrain from smoking. If you can, be sure to wait until everything is finished. Never use the saucer as an ashtray.

17. If you spilled something on yourself or on the tablecloth, do not dramatize the situation. You don't have to jump off the table. Put a napkin on the flooded place of the table, blot your clothes with a napkin too. You can ask the waiter to bring more napkins.

18. If you doused your neighbor, you need to quietly apologize and offer to pay for the cleaning. No need to try to wipe your neighbor or neighbor with anything, just offer your napkin.

19. If you drop solid food, you should use a spoon or the tip of your knife to pick up a piece from the tablecloth.

20. If someone leaves the table - do not ask - "where?" If you go out on your own, apologize.

21. Control appliances with your fingers, not your hand. Eat at an average pace. The art is to start and end with everyone together.

22. Butter only the piece of bread that you put in your mouth.

23. Avoid looking around at those sitting at neighboring tables, develop peripheral vision.

24. At the table it is not customary to talk about health, good or bad. If you need to take a pill - take it, no need to explain why and why.

25. Come to the feast at exactly the appointed time. A man should seat a woman, respectively pushing and moving a chair, sit to the LEFT of her, and if the table is small - on the contrary.

26. The biggest miss is picking your teeth with a fork and eating from a knife.

27. How to sit at the table correctly

The correct posture that should be taken at the table means that you need to sit straight, not hunched over, but not as if you “swallowed an arshin”, but slightly leaning back in your chair. Hands, when they are not busy with a knife and fork, can be lowered to your knees - this will help get rid of the bad habit of rolling bread balls, drawing on the tablecloth with a knife, aimlessly moving plates and appliances around the table. Well, if you are such a fidget, you can put brushes on the edge of the table, but not your elbows - this way you will feel less constrained. Try to keep your hands away from your face, and don't twist or touch your hair.

Although we hear from childhood “they don’t put their elbows on the table,” there are times when this is not only acceptable, but simply necessary. For example, in a restaurant, loud music sounds, drowning out your words, and in order for the interlocutor to hear you, you have to move towards him with your whole body. This movement - especially when it comes to a woman - will look much more graceful if you lean your elbows on the table, and not your palms on your knees, as if you suddenly felt great pain. But at home, where there is no need to lean towards the interlocutor in order to say something loudly to him across the table, one should not lean on the table. At a formal dinner, as in a restaurant, you can put your elbows on the table, leaning forward to talk to the person sitting opposite. However, even in these special situations, the elbows are never placed on the table while eating.

A person slouching and lounging in a chair, or swaying on it, looks very ugly - the latter is not only considered a flagrant violation of the rules of good manners, but also creates a serious threat to the legs of the chair.

28. Napkin

Under normal circumstances, when you sit down at the table, you unfold the napkin and place it on your lap, but at a formal dinner, it is customary to wait until the hostess does it first. There is no special wisdom in how to unfold the napkin - you just don’t need to do it with a sharp movement. Taking a napkin from the table, you carefully place it on your lap. If the size of the napkin allows, you can even somehow secure it so that it does not slip to the floor. If not, just unfold it as far as you see fit with both hands.

In no case should a man tuck a napkin behind his collar, or between the buttons of his shirt, or behind the belt of his trousers.

When using a napkin, do not wipe your mouth with it, but slightly blot your lips - it looks much more attractive.

If you have already finished eating or need to get up from the table, place the napkin to your left, and when the plates are cleared, in front of you. It should not be folded again or crumple - let it lie freely, while not taking up too much space. At a dinner party, the hostess, as a sign that the meal is over, puts her napkin on the table, and the guests do the same, but only after the hostess, and not before.

If it is customary in the family to use napkin rings, the napkin should be refolded and threaded through the ring for one or two more uses.

29. When you serve yourself and when you are served

When shifting food to your plate, you need to be careful and hold the spreading spoon or fork so as not to drop what you are taking on the tablecloth, on the floor, on yourself or on a neighbor.

All dishes served on pieces of toasted bread (toast), except for fried pigeons and quails - mushrooms, asparagus, "sweet meat" - should be taken from the tray along with them, because, firstly, it is easier to transfer everything to your plate , and secondly, a pile of soft toast on a tray is an unattractive sight. And therefore, the toast with everything that is on it is picked up from below with a spoon, held on top with a fork and transferred to your plate, on the edge of which you can then put the bread if you do not want to eat it. When food is taken only with a spoon, you should be especially careful and careful.

Gravy or sauce is poured over meat, potatoes, or rice, while pickles, seasonings, or jelly are placed next to the main course. Olives, radishes, nuts are placed on a snack plate, if there is one, and if not, then on the edge of your plate.

When passing your plate for a bite, leave your fork and knife on it, making sure they don't slip off.

The host arranges the food on plates and passes them counterclockwise to the guests: everyone who sits on the right takes a plate from his neighbor on the left and sends it further. If a lady sits to the right of the owner, she leaves the plate for herself, but passes the next one to the guest at the very end of the table. The third goes to the last one on the right, the fourth goes to his neighbor on the left, and so on. When all the guests sitting on the right hand of the owner are served, the plates begin to be passed to those sitting on the left side. Lastly, the owner puts food for himself. When the food is laid out by the hostess, who takes a place at the opposite end of the table, she follows the same order.

The "family style" of the dinner assumes that the host or hostess lays out only meat or another main dish, and trays with the rest of the dishes are thrown around so that everyone can put as much as they want. The trays are also passed counterclockwise. The man does not care for his neighbor on the right, but puts his portion on his plate. He, however, can hold the dish until the lady puts herself food. If a guest sitting at the far end of the table asks for more, and the dish “on the way” turns out to be with you, you have the right to say: “Do you mind if I put a little first for myself so that I don’t pass this dish back later?”. In the event that only one serving remains on the dish, this, of course, should not be done.

At family dinners, when the mother knows who likes what and how much she can eat, she puts the food on plates in the kitchen and brings the filled plates to the table herself or with the help of one of the children. This is not allowed in the presence of guests - guests are given the right to choose and serve their own food. Exceptions here are possible only for specially prepared and served dishes like "Benedictine eggs", which must be "put together" in the kitchen.

The maid, serving food to the guests, holds out the dish on the left. If the food is not to your liking, just say, "No, thanks."

30. How to refuse the proposed dish

If you are offered a dish that you are allergic to or that you particularly dislike, you can politely decline: “No, thank you.” However, the rules of good manners recommend taking at least a small piece from each dish and placing what you have not touched on a plate so that it is not noticeable. The old rule of not leaving anything on the plate is outdated today, but the hostess will no doubt be upset if she sees that you put yourself a large portion and did not even touch it, not to mention that it would be simply wasteful. It is not necessary to explain why you refuse food, but if the reason lies in the fact that you have an allergy, or you are on a diet, or the doctor does not recommend it to you, you can, sparing the pride of the hostess, quietly, without attracting the attention of other guests, explain to her , what's the matter.

When refusing a dish offered by a waiter, quietly say "No, thanks" or simply shake your head - this form of refusal is now more common.

At lunch "a la buffet", when there are several dishes to choose from, you can just take what you like best. If the waiters at such a dinner are at the table with appetizers, you only have to point to the dish you like by stretching your plate forward, or say “No thanks” with a smile if they are going to put you not what you wanted.

31. Cutlery

You should never think about what kind of fork and knife to eat this or that dish. Everything is very simple: they start with the cutlery located farthest from the plate, and with each change of dishes they take those knives and forks that are closest to it. This question comes up again and again, and the answer is always the same. There is, however, one exception - in the event that the table is set incorrectly and the order of the cutlery is confused, take a fork and knife that are suitable for the dish you are going to eat. For example, an oyster fork is closer to the plate than a regular fork, but this does not mean that you should use a regular shrimp cocktail fork and eat the main course with a small oyster fork. In all other cases, the order remains the same: start with the farthest device and, proceeding to each next dish, take the fork and knife that are closer to the plate.

When you have finished eating the main course, place the fork and knife on the plate in parallel - so that their handles protrude slightly from the edge of the plate, diagonally from left to right and from top to bottom. It is also customary to put a dessert spoon and fork. When the dessert is served in a vase with a high leg or in a deep vase on a separate plate, the spoon is placed on this plate. If the vase is small and wide, the spoon can be left in it or placed on a plate.

How to use a knife and fork

How to properly handle a knife and fork is best shown through illustrations. By carefully examining the drawings, you will understand how best to use cutlery to cut a bird, and how to bring food to your mouth more conveniently and gracefully.

In America, it is customary to eat "zigzag": the fork is shifted from the left hand to the right after a piece of meat or poultry is cut off. This manner is quite correct, but, in my opinion, too complicated, and loses compared to the "European" style, when the knife remains in the right hand and the fork in the left, since this is both simpler and more elegant. Although some people think that it is snobbish to perceive a "foreign" manner, I do not see anything wrong with adopting a more practical custom.

32. How to help yourself with food

Bread crust is the best way to help with eating. A knife is also suitable for this purpose - provided that you use it correctly. The knife should be held in the left hand in the same position in which you hold it in the right when cutting food, and put the pieces on the fork with its tip. This movement is natural, and therefore quite acceptable.

33. Getting out of predicaments at the table

- Food that is too hot or of poor quality

If, after putting food in your mouth, you feel that it is too hot, drink it down quickly with water. Only when there are no drinks, you can get rid of the sky-burning piece by quickly and imperceptibly pulling it out of your mouth with your fingers or spitting it on a fork, and then placing it on the edge of the plate. The same should be done with spoiled food. If the taste of an oyster or some other shellfish seemed suspicious to you, do not swallow them, but remove them from your mouth - quickly and as imperceptibly as possible. However, spitting something into the corner of a napkin is unnecessary and unacceptable.

- When you choke on meat or bone

Although each of us has heard that a piece of food that got “in the wrong throat” led to someone's death, in fact, most often the situation of a choked person is far from being so tragic. If a sip of water doesn't help, try coughing with a tissue over your mouth. Remove the stuck piece of food or fish bone from your mouth with your fingers and place it on the edge of your plate. If you feel like you need to induce a longer coughing fit, excuse yourself and get up from the table.

However, when you are choking heavily, do not hesitate to call for help. The trouble is that a person in this position is not able to speak, cough, and generally make any sounds whatsoever. Therefore, by any means attract attention to yourself and remember that there is no time for good manners. Try to remain calm and act quickly - this can save your life.

- If you cough, sneeze or want to blow your nose

To perform one of these actions - if it does not take too long - it is not at all necessary to get up from the table. In extreme cases, you can apologize, go to another room and deal with a cough or an uncontrollable sneeze there. When you feel a cough coming on, cover your mouth and nose with a handkerchief, and if you do not have a handkerchief or time to get it, with a napkin. In the most extreme case, just your palm will do - it's better than nothing. You should never blow your nose on a tissue. If there is nothing suitable at hand, apologize and hurry to the bathroom.

- If there is a pebble, hair or insect in the plate

If something inedible is caught in food, the only way out is to get rid of it, and as discreetly as possible. Remove the foreign object from your mouth with your fingertips and place it on the edge of your plate. When this "something" - a hair in oil, a worm on a lettuce leaf, a fly in the soup - you noticed even before the foreign object got into your mouth, try to remove it without attracting attention to yourself and continue eating. If the impression turned out to be too strong and completely discouraged your appetite, just put the plate away so as not to embarrass the hostess. In a restaurant, on the contrary, you not only can, but you must point out to the waiter that the dish was served in a substandard form and demand a replacement. However, an observant and attentive hostess, noticing that you have stopped eating and guessing what's the matter, will make sure that you bring another portion.

- If food is stuck in the teeth

You can’t use a toothpick at the table and it’s completely unacceptable to remove a piece of food stuck in your teeth with your fingers. If it causes pain, apologize, get up from the table and go to the bathroom. Or wait for a pause, say, a change of dishes and, leaving the dining room, ask for a toothpick.

The same should be done when a piece of food is stuck in a denture. You should apologize and, going to the bathroom, rinse it.

- If you drop or spill something

When it comes to solid food, you should use a clean spoon or the blade of your knife to pick up a piece from the tablecloth, for example, jelly, a slice of cucumber, etc. If there is a stain on the tablecloth, moisten the corner of your napkin with water from a glass and try to wipe it off. Apologize to the owners, who, in turn, should not draw attention to this incident, so as not to aggravate your embarrassment.

If you spill wine or water at a formal dinner or in a restaurant, calmly call the waiter and ask him to bring a napkin to cover the stain. At a family dinner where there are no servants, try to wipe off the stain with a napkin or sponge and, in general, help the hostess get rid of it as best you can.

What not to do at the table

Although I'm much more comfortable telling you what to do in certain circumstances, sometimes it's necessary to focus on what you should never do. Below are the most important rules regarding what not to do at the table. When eating in one hand you hold a spoon or fork, the other hand should not clasp the plate. When you finish your meal, don't push your plate away from you. She must remain in her place until the waiter or maid removes her from the table. If the dinner was held without servants, you can take and carry an empty plate to the kitchen yourself. Do not lean back in your chair, declaring out loud: "That's it, I've had enough!", Or: "I can't take it anymore!" The fact that you have finished eating should be evidenced by the fork and knife placed on the plate in an appropriate way. Never drink anything until you have chewed and swallowed the food. It is allowed to drink coffee, holding a small piece of toasted bread in your mouth - so small that it is imperceptible to others. However, it is still better not to combine food and drink. Do not wipe down your appliance in a restaurant. If you have doubts about the cleanliness of the knife and fork, call the waiter, show him the cutlery and ask for a replacement. Women need to ensure that traces of lipstick do not remain on a napkin, on the rim of a glass, on a fork or spoon, and therefore you should not abuse cosmetics before dinner. When bringing a cup to your mouth, do not put your little finger away - it looks pretentious. Never leave a spoon in a cup: not only is it ugly, but it can also lead to an accident. Don't swing your fork or spoon around during a lively conversation, especially when there's leftover food on them. Most often this is done with ice cream, but the fact that it is too cold cannot serve as an excuse in this case. It is better to take a smaller spoonful, but swallow this portion immediately. Do not immediately cut everything that lies in front of you on a plate - this is an unappetizing sight. Do not put a lot of mashed potatoes or peas on a fork that has already been pierced with meat. In other words, try never to fill your mouth with any food.

Having familiarized yourself with the rules of etiquette at the table, you will always feel at your place while eating, not only at a party, but also at business receptions and in a restaurant. The key to success will be your confidence and knowledge. We suggest that you familiarize yourself with the rules of conduct at the table and try to immediately put into practice the studied material.

As soon as you find yourself at a party, cafe or restaurant, people immediately pay attention to your behavior. How you behave at the table, whether you know how to use the devices correctly - this will help to draw a certain conclusion and understand whether you are a cultured and educated person, or you still have a lot to learn.

Table etiquette culture

Let's start with the main thing - with the general rules. Have you noticed how you sit? The back should be straight. You need to sit not on the very edge of the chair, but in such a way that you feel comfortable. Sitting, bend your elbows so that they are level with the appliances. When there is nowhere to put their hands, they are placed on their knees. In this position, it is convenient to wait for the dish to be served. If you are visiting, then you need to wait until the host of the feast offers to start the meal. It is not necessary to wait for late guests.

Table etiquette says - when the table is large, it is impossible to reach all the dishes, so you need to take only those that can be reached with an outstretched hand. It is impossible to bend over a neighbor and interfere with him. In the event that you wish to take a distant dish, then you can ask the guest who is convenient to serve it to do this. Don't forget to politely thank the person for the help.

According to the rules of etiquette at the table, before the start of the meal, the host must make sure that the table is fully laid.

How food should be served:

1. According to the rules of table etiquette, dishes are served across the table from the left to the right.
2. One person can hold the dish, and the second can fill the plate.
3. If the dish is too heavy and inconvenient to hold on weight, then it can be put on the table.
4. The tureen must be passed with the protruding part forward to the guest.
5. When the food on the dish needs to be cut, then according to the rules of etiquette at the table, the person who holds the dish must wait until the neighbor cuts off and puts the food on his plate with common utensils.

Table setting etiquette

Regardless of the organization of the event, you need to set the table according to all the rules. First you need to try to make each guest feel at the table freely. Try to seat guests so that there is a small gap between the chairs.

Now about the most important thing - how to properly set the table. There are many ways to serve: for different times of the day and individual occasions. In addition, the ways of table setting in different countries differ and depend on the customs and culture of the population. We will consider the classic type of serving.

The basis of serving is a tablecloth. More often choose a cloth of light and white color. According to the rules of serving, the corners of the canvas should cover the legs of the table (square or rectangular). The tablecloth should not fall below the level of the seat, a maximum of 25-30 centimeters.

You need to spread the fabric cloth freely at the table, lifting and shaking it from the ends so that air forms between the fabric and the table - this will make it easier to distribute the tablecloth on the surface. You can not pull the canvas by the corners and stretch it.

Napkins play a role in table setting. They can be chosen to match the tablecloth or in a contrasting color.

Cloth napkins (linen or cotton) are used for special occasions, and paper napkins are used for every day. A napkin is placed on a plate rolled up for each guest. A paper napkin is allowed to be placed under the plate on the right side.

Table etiquette. Serving cutlery

When setting the table with cutlery, you need to take into account the number of dishes and their type, and think in advance what kind of dishes you will need. For example, if there are dishes on the table that are customary to eat without cutlery, then you need to put napkins or put a container of water.

How to properly set the table:

1. Look at the table and mentally divide it into separate zones, taking into account the fact that 80 centimeters of length should be allocated for each person. Place a serving plate - this shallow, large-diameter plate serves as a coaster. The next one is put on it - with food. Puree soup is served in a soup bowl, and the broth is served in a special bowl.
2. To the left of the serving plate is a bread plate (pie). Next to it is a container with water and lemon slices for rinsing hands if food is eaten with your hands.
3. Basic cutlery: forks, spoons and knives are laid out on the right and left sides of the plate. The knife is on the right, and the fork is on the left. When dessert is listed on the menu, then the spoon is placed over the plate.
4. For ice cream, put a teaspoon.
5. Four glasses of wine and water can be placed on the table at the same time.

Table setting rules for etiquette:

Dinner table etiquette

The design of the table is of great importance. The mood and appetite of family members and guests will depend on how well the table is served.

Dinner table setting:

1. The table is covered with a tablecloth and a snack plate is placed on it. To her left is a pie shop.
2. Two forks are placed between the plates: a canteen and a diner, cloves up. On the right is a knife. The blades are located towards the plate.
3. One glass is placed behind the snack plate, and a napkin is placed on the plate itself. You don't need to unpack it completely.
4. A vase of flowers is placed in the middle of the table.
5. When the hostess serves the table, the serving is allowed to be supplemented with cutlery.
6. The soup is served in special bowls to the right of the seated person. At a festive dinner, preheated soup is poured into a tureen and placed next to the hostess.
7. If a fruit compote with seeds is served for dessert, then you need to put a bowl on a saucer.
8. Coffee and tea for all family members are served in a coffee pot, cups and saucers are placed on the table in advance. If the drink is immediately poured into cups, then they are served on a tray along with saucers and spoons.
9. Sugar is served in a separate sugar bowl along with a spoon.

The day before the proposed feast, review your dishes - they must be clean.

Table etiquette lessons

You need to sit at the table slightly leaning forward. Sit on the entire seat of the chair.

When a person sits at a table, then only brushes can be placed on it, and it is better to press the elbows to the body.

Table etiquette says you can't chew with your mouth open. When you chew food, it is undesirable to talk, there is no need to rush either.

The remains of food between the teeth are taken out with toothpicks, but only in the restroom. If you come across cartilage, then the contents are removed, lowered onto a spoon and transferred to a plate.

According to the rules of table etiquette, the napkin can be removed from the plate when dishes are served. She is turned on her knees. After eating, wipe hands and mouth with a napkin. They do not crush it - they carefully place it on the table. A paper napkin can be wrinkled and put on a plate.

Table etiquette rules:

• the fork is held in the left hand, and the knife in the right;
• when using one fork, it is held in the right hand;
• while chewing food, cutlery is placed on a plate.

Etiquette at the table photo:

Table etiquette: briefly

1. Bread must be broken off by hand.
2. Oil is taken with a fork.
3. Fish bones are separated with a special knife, and meat with a fork.
4. Soft cheeses are allowed to spread on a slice of bread. Hard cheeses are placed with a fork on a plate.
5. The broth is eaten with a spoon, meat and croutons are caught with a spoon. First, the broth is eaten, and then the pieces of meat.
6. Porridge is eaten with a dessert spoon.
7. A piece of meat is cut off from a piece of meat and brought to the mouth together with a side dish.
8. Pasta is eaten with a fork. Spaghetti is lowered into the middle of the plate and lifted up to separate a small portion. Spaghetti is wound on a fork and eaten immediately.
9. The soup is not eaten to the end, and the spoon must remain in the plate all the time.
10. The kebab is removed from the skewer and put on a plate.
11. Watermelon slices are eaten with a fork.
12. Cherries and pitted cherries are taken by the twigs. The bones are first spit into a fist, and then discreetly sent to a plate.
13. If tea is poured into a glass, then you can leave the spoon, and if it is into a cup, you need to get it. The pieces of sugar do not stir much, but wait until they dissolve.

Etiquette at the table in pictures

Festive table etiquette:

Restaurant etiquette

Have you decided to go to a restaurant? Then you just need to familiarize yourself with the rules of etiquette in advance.

So the man enters first. If the visitors are both women and men, then the one who will pay for the dinner should enter first. In the case when the porter meets you at the entrance to the restaurant, the woman should enter first.

If a meeting with a woman is scheduled in the institution, then the man comes first 5 minutes before the appointed time. He undresses and finds out where his table is. Then you can return to the hall, meet the lady and help her undress.

If a table is booked for several people, then it is allowed to wait 20 minutes for latecomers. After that, you can go to the table.

In the event that a man accompanies a woman, he must give her the right to choose a seat at the table, for example, facing the stage. Seats facing the hall and the entrance are considered convenient. The man should sit opposite or to the left of the lady. If there are two men, then the woman sits between them.

According to the rules of etiquette at the table, the man chooses the menu himself. It is allowed to offer a woman a choice of several selected dishes. She should not choose very expensive and cheap dishes. The phrase: “Order what you yourself will eat” will also be inappropriate.

According to the rules of etiquette at the table in a restaurant, you cannot laugh and talk loudly, as well as lean your elbows on the table. In addition, at the table you can not use a comb, wipe your face with napkins, examine dishes with interest and wipe them. Do not vigorously blow on hot food.

After the ordered dishes are served, you can start eating. If you do not like something in the food, then you can invite the waiter and ask him to replace the dish.

Both men and women are allowed to order alcoholic drinks. The wine can be tasted and after a nod of approval the waiter will fill the glasses. A restaurant visitor has every right to refuse an insufficiently chilled drink.

During and after the meal, cutlery is folded according to non-verbal communication with the waiter:

According to the rules of etiquette, it is forbidden to smoke indoors.

By the end of the meal, you need to decide who will pay for the reception. A man is allowed to pay for a lady if she doesn't mind. By the way, now you will not surprise anyone with the fact that a woman pays herself. She should discuss this with the man in advance.

When paying, you need to look at the check and put the money inside a special booklet or on a plate. Tipping is 10-15 percent of the amount.

Etiquette at the table for children

How to teach your child the rules of table etiquette? Start at an early age. Just when the baby turns a year old - it's time to start. First, it is enough to show the baby how the mother behaves at the table, so that he tries to imitate.

Meal preparation

The kid should know that the main thing in preparing for food is clean hands. When the baby is still small, mom helps him wash his hands. Only after that is it allowed to sit down at the table. Two-year-olds no longer need to be forced to wash their hands, this should happen automatically, on a subconscious level. If the child is lazy, then parents should often remind the baby of the simple rules of hygiene.

Boys from an early age should be taught to be a gentleman, and dad should be an example.

The baby should be seated on a special chair that moves closer to the table. It is desirable for the child to be on the same level with the parents. He should sit on the left side of the mother so that in any situation she can help the baby.
Try to teach the baby to eat together at certain hours. The kid must learn that if food is put on the table, then you can’t pounce on it, you need to wait for permission and after the magic words “bon appetit”, start eating. Also, you can’t grab pieces while mom sets the table. This should be stopped immediately, but not with shouts, but in a calm tone to tell that this is not necessary.

When the baby is sitting at the table, a cloth napkin is placed on his knees, and a paper napkin is placed under the plate. If the child is very small, then they put on a protective bib, but they still put a napkin on their feet. You can wipe your cheeks, mouth and dirty hands with a paper towel.

How to teach your child to use appliances

A child under three years old is given a spoon in his hands, and after three years, you can teach your baby to use a fork. You shouldn't leave your child alone.

A five-year-old child is introduced to the rules of etiquette at the table gradually. Just at this age, you can master a new object - a knife. To make the acquaintance successful, give your child an individual set with bright pens. He will quickly learn to use the devices.

About table manners

Often mothers repeat: “You can’t play with food!”, “Don’t talk with your mouth full!”, “Don’t spin!”.
From an early age, you need to teach your child simple rules of etiquette at the table:

• they don’t play at the table, they don’t sing and they don’t shout;
• do not talk with a full mouth;
• do not dig in the plate with your hands;
• you can not spit out food;
• what is on the plate - you need to eat it completely;
• dirty hands and mouth are wiped with a napkin;
• after the meal is over, say "Thank you";
• no need to leave the table until all family members have finished. You can leave only if adults allow.

We teach crumbs etiquette at the table

A good example for a child is his parents. Children quickly absorb the behavior of others, and if it is customary in the family to make noise at the table, take food with their hands, then the child will behave this way. You can avoid this behavior - teach your baby table etiquette in the form of a game. You can plant your favorite toys nearby and, together with your child, “teach” them the rules of etiquette at the table.

In addition, it is advisable to serve food to the child in different dishes and tell what each appliance is for. An older child can be asked to help arrange the appliances. Do not yell at the baby, so he will step back and will not want to continue learning table etiquette.

Etiquette at the table - video

Each of us would do well to brush up on the rules of etiquette at the table, and perhaps even learn something new about how to behave while eating. The most important rules of etiquette that absolutely everyone should use.

Each of us notices when someone in a cafe at a nearby table eats carelessly or stealthily wipes his hands on his knees. In the same way, other people notice our mistakes, any behavior is conspicuous and can cause embarrassment. Therefore, it is better to check yourself and correct your own behavior if necessary.

How to behave at the table

General rules apply to any situation, they will never be superfluous. The first thing we pay attention to when we see a person is his posture. Posture characterizes not only the behavior or condition of a person, but also reveals the secrets of his character.

An insecure person will fidget nervously on the edge of a chair, a notorious person will try to slouch in order to become less noticeable. Sit up straight, but in a way that is comfortable for you. Hands can be placed on the edge of the table or on your knees, and it is better to press your elbows to your sides.

By the way, in order to learn how to hold your elbows near the body in Soviet times, it was advised to periodically train - have lunch, holding a couple of weighty books to your elbows. This is necessary so that the correct bodily pattern is formed, and you keep your elbows flawlessly even when you don’t think about it at all.

The rules of table etiquette imply almost all situations that can happen to a person and give a clear recommendation on how to act in a given situation.

Naturally, table etiquette at home and restaurant etiquette are somewhat different. However, there are rules that are appropriate in any situation:

• do not speak too loudly;
• do not take a fork or spoon with food too far from the mouth;
• you can not make sounds while eating;
• eat calmly, without undue haste.

Restaurant

The rules of conduct in a restaurant imply some composure - you need to behave correctly and with dignity in order to make a good impression on others.

1. A man must let the lady go ahead, but if a company of men or women goes to the restaurant, then everyone is on an equal footing or rely on the initiator of the dinner.
2. If several people are to meet at dinner, and someone is late, then, by mutual agreement with the rest of the guests, you can wait for those who are late for about a quarter of an hour. A longer wait is a sign of disrespect for guests who arrived on time.
3. If you happened to be late, then you should apologize, and then just join the others. You should not draw special attention to the fact of being late and explain the reason, just join in the table conversation.
4. During a meeting of a man and a woman in a restaurant, a man should read the menu and offer his companion any dishes. For a girl in this case, expressing her indifference is a sign of bad manners. Etiquette in a restaurant implies the participation of a lady in the choice of dishes.
5. In a restaurant, you should not conduct a conversation in raised tones and laugh out loud. If this happened by accident, it makes sense to apologize to other visitors and be quieter. Observe table etiquette, and if someone behaves inappropriately at the next table, then this should be reported to the waiter.
6. You need to start eating when the waiter brought out the ordered dishes to all those present. If a person who is waiting for his dish to be prepared does not mind, he can make an offer to others to start eating.
7. It is strictly forbidden to engage in hygiene procedures at the table - wipe your face, neck and hands with napkins, comb your hair or tint your lips. If you need to pay attention to your appearance, it is better to do it in a special room. Dining etiquette also does not welcome traces of lipstick on dishes. Before you start eating, the girl should carefully remove the lipstick with a napkin.
8. Any interaction with food also looks uncivilized - food is on the table in order to eat it. Taking photos for Instagram, blowing on the soup, meticulously poking around in the salad, commenting on the ingredients - is indecent.
9. If you come across cartilage or a bone in some dish, you need to carefully return the inedible element back to the spoon and move it to a plate (or napkin).

How to handle appliances

1. In no case should you check the cleanliness of the appliances, and if you still notice a cloudy spot on the fork or spoon, you need to quietly draw the attention of the waiter to this oversight and politely ask for a replacement.
2. In most restaurants, the table is set in advance, and cutlery is laid out on both sides of the serving plate.
3. Do not get lost if there are more dishes on the table than you expected to see - everything has its own purpose, and if you are in doubt about which fork or spoon you should take, you can always see how other guests solve this problem.
4. Those devices that lie on the left of the plate are used with the left hand, and those that are laid out on the right must be held in the right hand.
5. With complex serving, each dish relies on its own devices, so if you are in doubt which fork should be taken, take the far one - the one that is farthest from the edge of the plate. As you change dishes, you will gradually approach the nearest appliances.
6. The knife is used either for cutting food or for spreading pâtés and butter (for example, during breakfasts). You should not try pieces from a knife.
7. Cut meat or fish should be sequentially, as it is eaten. Cutting the whole portion at once is a bad form. It is generally accepted that this way the dish cools down faster and loses its main flavors.

Learn in advance a few differences between different cutlery, so as not to get into a mess.

Forks

• second hot dishes are eaten with a table fork, it has four cloves, and in length it is slightly inferior to the diameter of the plate and is placed on the left;
• a fish fork is used for hot fish dishes, looks smaller than a diner and has four short cloves, a fish fork is easy to recognize by its recesses - they are needed to separate the bones;
• snack fork - a reduced duplicate of a table fork, they eat cold snacks with it;
• dessert fork - for pies, small, corresponds to the size of a dessert plate and looks atypical;
• a fruit fork equipped with two prongs, usually served with a fruit knife;
• the remaining forks are considered auxiliary, they are placed next to the dish that they need to eat.

Knives

• any second hot dishes are eaten with a table knife, it is placed to the right of the plate, the blade is turned to the plate;
• a fish knife is blunt and resembles a spatula, used to separate the flesh of the fish from the bones;
• the snack knife is small and has teeth;
• dessert and fruit knife look similar - they are the smallest.

spoons

• a tablespoon - the largest, lies to the right of the plate;
• a dessert spoon is served with a dessert that does not require cutting - soft puddings, jellies and whipped cream;
• an ice cream spoon is served with a bowl;
• the cocktail spoon has a very narrow and long handle;
• a teaspoon can be served with any hot drink;
• coffee spoon - the smallest, served only with black coffee.

Dialogue and table manners

Table etiquette includes not only the use of utensils, correct positioning and good posture, but also the manner in which dialogues and conversations are conducted.

It is worth noting that table etiquette categorically prohibits discussing provocative issues that can lead to a serious conflict - therefore, one should refrain from commenting on money, politics and religion.

How to behave at the table and what to say? Be sure to look at the person who is addressing you, listen without interrupting, and only then answer. If you think some questions of the interlocutor are inappropriate for a meal, delicately offer to discuss this a little later. In all other cases, the answer should be easy and unconstrained.

The rules of etiquette in a restaurant do not imply violent disputes either - refrain from inappropriate comments and lighten the mood with a cute joke if someone else raises their voice.

You should not talk only together, involve the rest of the participants in the meal. For example, if the conversation turned to a recent vacation, you can ask one of the interlocutors if he is going to go on vacation in the near future or what places he prefers to relax.

It is also a good tone in any table conversation to praise the host, chef or initiator of the meeting - find a few kind words to note the general atmosphere of the evening.

A short course in etiquette

• Do what the majority does.
• Don't point out to others their mistakes, in the most extreme case, this can be said quietly in an undertone and only to your neighbor on the table.
• Don't skip meals for too long.
• Leaving the table - apologize.
• Try everything and eat what you like.
• Diet, eating disorders, restrictions on alcoholic beverages and diet are not discussed at the common table.

It is better to study some rules of behavior at the table by looking at the pictures - look at the basic table setting patterns, you can also watch the video on how to properly hold this or that device.

Table etiquette is not that difficult if you give it a little time, and following all the rules will help you present your best side.

Young parents do not always take seriously the advice of elders in raising children, and they consider teaching their baby the rules of behavior at the table as the tenth thing. So it comes down in some families to completely non-pedagogical shouts: “don’t champ, close your mouth and chew, sit up straight, don’t rock in your chair, don’t grab from the table before dinner…”. On this they consider their mission completed. And the grandmother knows for sure that in a few years parents will have to blush for such an undergrowth. Or another situation, the kid has been poking around in the soup for half an hour, choosing from there what he likes best, as a result pushing the plate away, spilling the contents on the floor, on the table and on himself ... A familiar situation? Forgivable if the child is only a year old. What if it's four or five? Where is the line between childish awkwardness and lack of good manners? And when should you start introducing your child to the basics of etiquette? Let's see what the rules of behavior for children at the table should be.

Everyone remembers a few unpleasant moments when a neighbor's teenager or a kid invited to a children's party simply disrupted lunch with their behavior. They talked loudly, stretched across the table for the best piece of cake, slurped, and even choked, not chewing food. The list of unacceptable acts is endless.

Let's protect ourselves from such behavior of a son or daughter in the future. Let's try to systematize the training of our crumbs in good manners, so that it is not burdensome either for them or for us. The best age to start training is 1.5 - 2 years. Naturally, at this age, the child will not be able to understand all the rules of adult etiquette. Yes, this is not necessary.

When to teach? Everything has its time

Table manners for kids are slightly different from adult etiquette, because many hyperactive children become little pranksters during meals. Most children learn good manners before the age of 5. But you need to start teaching a child as early as 1.5 - 2 years. Of course, there may be exceptions to the rules, but be aware that the later you start training, the more difficult your lessons will be for your child.

We read an article on how to teach a child to eat independently and carefully -

from 1.5 to 5

• At this age, the child is actively mastering the skills of the world around him. He absorbs everything he sees, tries to imitate adults. It's time to learn the basics of etiquette in a playful way;
• It is mandatory to wash your hands before eating. Mom herself should not forget to wash her hands before feeding the baby. Before each meal, she should go to the bathroom with the baby and wash her hands and herself and him. Over time, it will do this automatically;
• Feeding the baby should definitely take place at the dinner table, and not in the nursery and not in front of the TV. This will help your child to take food seriously in the future, to respect the work of those who prepare food. Put the baby on a high chair so that he does not look out from under the table, but feels like an equal member of the family;
• Lay a linen napkin on your baby's lap. Clothes will stay clean even if the child spills soup or tea. As an adult, having a napkin in a restaurant will not put your child into a stupor;
• Do not let the child play with food, crumble bread, spread porridge on the table. Such behavior is not permissible even at 2 years old. Try to patiently explain to the baby that it’s ugly to behave like that, that mom is ashamed of him. Mom and dad never act like that. Of course, the baby will not listen to you the first time;
• Only one rule: never yell at him. Be patient and consistent in your demands. It is impossible today to forbid something, and tomorrow not to notice what was created by the child;
• By the age of five, children should already be able to handle a fork and knife, while children's. They should not be confused that the knife should be held in the right hand and the fork in the left hand. By this age, you need to teach the child which foods are eaten with the help of appliances, and which ones are taken by hand.

5 to 10

The most fruitful age for education, but also the most difficult. During this period, the child does not so unconditionally trust the words of the parents. He already independently tries to understand the life and actions of the people around him.

Mom and dad should not allow any indulgence for themselves in the ritual of eating. If you teach a child not to drink juices from a package, but to pour them into a glass, it would be unacceptable to violate this rule yourself. Or just one day forget to wash your hands before dinner. Or not to thank the hostess for dinner. The child will notice this, and your words will no longer be true for him.

(The picture is clickable, you can copy and print)

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At 5 - 6 years old, the baby must learn how to behave at the table and no longer violate accepted norms. Each violation must be discussed with the child at the family council. This will help him understand the seriousness of the demands of adults. But in no case should a “debriefing” be carried out in the presence of strangers, in a derogatory manner or with the help of shouting and swearing.

• The kid already knows that you need to sit at the dining table straight, not swaying in a chair. It is unacceptable to spread your elbows and push your neighbors on the table with them. If it is difficult to enforce this rule with words, the reception with books helps a lot. During lunch, stick your child's armpit on a book and ask them to hold them until the end of the meal. A few of these exercises, and there will be no problems with the elbows;
• The child does not allow himself to champ loudly, speak with a full mouth. It was instilled in him constantly. He also knows that you need to put small pieces of food in your mouth and chew them thoroughly;
• The kid is holding back belching and coughing. If this is not possible, he must turn away from the table and cover his mouth with a paper napkin;
• It will be quite natural for a child under 10 years old to know that one cannot consider himself the center of society and attract everyone's attention to his person with various loud demands. If the baby needs to move away from the table, he should ask permission from one of the parents in a quiet voice, calmly. It is not necessary for everyone to know what he wants to go to the toilet;
• You can not reach for a plate at the other end of the table through all the dishes. The child knows that he needs to ask to put the desired piece on his plate. You can’t rummage through a common dish in search of the best piece;
• You can sit down at the table only after adults, and get up after everyone has eaten. If you do not want to sit and listen to the conversations of adults, the child simply asks permission to leave;
• Gratitude for lunch should definitely manifest itself in the form of a magic word “thank you”.

10 and older

You did a good job teaching your offspring excellent manners and etiquette. However, it is too early to relax. He knows what every intelligent person should know and observe. But the rules of good manners and behavior at the table are not limited to this. Ahead is the study of special cutlery that is not used daily. It would be nice to introduce your child to how to eat various exotic dishes. It will not be superfluous to have general knowledge about the food traditions of the peoples of the world.

(The picture is clickable, you can copy and print)

1. Don't talk to your child in a didactic tone. For a better assimilation of the rules of etiquette, a game form of training is suitable. You can come up with a dinner party for dolls and bears, setting the table with toy dishes according to all adult standards. Responsible for this dinner, of course, will be your child. And you just prompt and advise in time.
2. Be consistent and patient in your learning. Do not allow yourself to take it out on the child, even if he has done something unacceptable. Do not forget to praise and support the child for success.
3. Involve your child in preparing dinner. Entrust him to arrange the plates, bring the bread to the table. Working together will bring together and make the baby more respectful of food and the one who cooks dinner.
4. Call on cartoons and fairy tales that talk about the rules of etiquette to help you. Discuss with your child the scene you just saw from the movie on the topic. Don't skip real life examples. The rules of behavior at the table should be vividly woven into reality, this is not a frozen dogma.
5. Your own example is the best lesson. Children always imitate adults. Let's use this for learning. Of course, it is not easy to always control yourself and not let you grab a piece of delicious food on the fly, but remember about the child.

Why should a child be taught etiquette?

Your efforts will not be in vain. Adult life will very soon become your baby's life. A joint lunch with a potential employer, a visit to a restaurant with a girl you like, a business dinner with partners, a corporate party ... Often the most serious conversations are conducted at the dinner table. We read an article with comments and experiments

Video minute: table etiquette

Psychologists say that it is necessary to teach a child the rules of etiquette at the table from early childhood: from a year to two:

How to sit at the table

Lessons in good manners. How to behave at the table? How to sit, what can and should not be done at the table? You will learn in the lessons of good manners:

How Koksik and Shunya learned the rules of table manners

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Once you have mastered the rules of table etiquette and how to hold cutlery, it will be easy for you to focus on the content of the event and feel more confident. And this is very important if the future depends on the evening, for example, an important contract.

If you are having dinner not in a restaurant, but at home, then first you need to properly set the table.

Arrive on time

This is about home remedies. If a guest is late for any reason, the hosts must be informed in a timely manner. But you shouldn't show up too early, because that can lead to fuss or embarrassment to the hosts.

Seats

Houses

The place on the short side of the table should be occupied by the owner of the house or the person who organizes the meeting. At the other end sits the hostess. If the table is round, she sits down so that it is convenient to look after the guests. Next to the owners are the most honorable places. When the table is rectangular, the most significant people should sit in the middle of the long side.

Usually ladies are invited to sit to the right of the owner, gentlemen - to the left of the hostess. The rest need to be seated so that the companions are pleasant to each other. For children or the younger and older generation, two different tables can be made. The hosts in any case sit with the older company.

Public place

The previous rules of table etiquette apply if the party is closed. In a restaurant, the best place from which you can see everything that happens in the hall and which is not on the aisle, men are inferior to girls.

Going to a restaurant

Entrance

Punctuality is a virtue, but when someone is still late, there are two options:

1. The early arrival waits in front of the entrance or, if it takes longer, in the lobby or bar.
2. In the second option, you can afford a small aperitif.

But if the first person is already reading the menu, it gives the laggards an unpleasant impression, although he could have arrived too early, and latecomers actually arrived on time.

Previously, a man would enter a restaurant first to open the lady's door, help take off his pair of coats, and escort her to the table. Today it is not so important whether courtesies are given to women. There are also special service personnel for these purposes, so this is usually not an issue. But such gestures are still pleasant for women, and a man will demonstrate the elements of a real gentleman's behavior.

Chair

The staff in a good multi-star restaurant will immediately pull out a chair for a lady. But if there are several girls at the table, then you can help with a chair for the partner. On less formal occasions, you can join as soon as the host is seated at the table.

In the past, if you leaned on the back of a chair, it was considered rude. But now you can signal to your partner in such a way that you are ready to move on to an important conversation.

Behavior at the table

Try to hide your excitement and not show that you do not know the rules of conduct at the dinner table. If you do not know how to use certain devices, then just look at what others are doing.

At the table you need not only to eat, but also to entertain guests. But it should be in reasonable volumes - taboos on the topics of disease, death, sex, religion and politics.

If you're not hungry, try a little bit of everything so you don't offend the person who made the food.

Phone and constant telephone conversations are elements of rude behavior towards guests. If the call is urgent or expected, the phone must remain connected in your pocket, otherwise you need to turn off the sound or set it to vibrate.

You can not smoke in front of the guests, even if you have already eaten and this does not bother anyone. Many restaurants have designated smoking areas where it does not bother other diners.

Wine

After the owner or the waiter has poured everyone's glasses, you should not immediately drink it. Do not make a toast if you are a guest, on your own initiative. You need to wait for the first sip or toast of the host of the evening.

The rule for children, although some adults do not know this, is that any drinks should be drunk quietly, not serbian and not squelching. And also, before you take a sip, wipe your lips and hands, otherwise there will be untidy greasy stains on the glass.

How to start eating

When the food is served, remove the napkin from the plate and place it on your lap. After you have wiped your mouth or hands, do not wrinkle it, but leave it on an empty dish. If you need to leave your seat for a short time, put it next to your plate. For children under 5 years old, their own rule is to tuck the napkin behind the collar to protect clothes.

When the food is served, wait until everyone is served. An exception can be made when the serving of dishes takes some time - then you can ask other guests for permission to start. It is necessary to apologize and say that otherwise the food will get cold.

Cutlery should be in hand - both while eating and when talking with neighbors. With a long conversation, you can put them on a plate in the shape of a triangle - just like in the diagram. If you have finished your meal, stack them parallel to each other, but their position on the plate matters - be careful.

For children, do not forget to explain that licking a knife or other sharp instruments is not allowed.

food allergy

Those who are allergic to certain foods should not make a fuss. To avoid noise, the dish you can't stand is simply left on the plate.

Meat, fish and spaghetti

Meat and poultry are taken from a common dish with a fork, and cut into small pieces in their plate. Do not cut everything at once, otherwise the food will cool faster.

Fish bones should be left on the edge of the dish. The norms of behavior at the table do not allow scatter of leftover food on the plate.
The bones that ended up in the mouth should be carefully placed on the fork and brought to the plate. If they are too small, it is permissible to carefully reach them with your thumb and forefinger.

Long pasta, such as spaghetti or tagliatelle, should be wrapped around a fork. You can use a spoon to help.

What should a child be taught?

For children, this must be explained first of all:

1. You can't put your elbows on the table. Push them to the sides.
2. Do not chew with your mouth open or slurp.
3. It is unacceptable to speak with the interlocutor if you have not chewed something.

Children should gradually be taught that table manners are important. But not all adult rules they can fulfill. For example, a glass may be too big for a small hand, in which case the child is allowed to hold it with two, while an adult should not do this. Also, do not give very young kids sharp instruments.

https://youtu.be/_C-pIm5gX8k

Tell them that stretching across the entire table is indecent, and you need to ask a neighbor to pass the right dish, and then thank you. It is nearly impossible for younger children to pour themselves something on their own, so he may ask adults to help.
Pay attention to him that you should not notify everyone if you want to go to the toilet - you just need to apologize and leave.

Watch the posture of children - immediately teach them to sit on a chair correctly, occupying it all, and not just the edge of the seat. Don't let them swing.

As for the child in the restaurant - everyone chooses what to do. Many take their children with them wherever they go. But do not forget that capricious children can ruin the rest of other visitors. If you nevertheless took him with you, but the child began to cry loudly, go somewhere out of the common room and calm him down there.

Payment

The evening is over. All that remains is paying for delicious food and drinks. If it's already advertised that you need multiple checks, this isn't a problem, but it can make your companions feel uncomfortable.

It will be great when someone pays for everyone alone, and then the amount is simply divided by the number of people, even if some ate more.

It is better to give a credit card - this is the most discreet way to pay the bill. No one looks at the amount on the check, especially if they were invited to dinner. A tip of 5 to 10% of the order amount is not required, but it indicates whether you are satisfied with the food and services.

If something did not suit you during the evening, you should not complain and ask for a price reduction. Always speak directly and immediately when something is wrong with a food or drink.